Archive for the ‘drugs’ Tag

Angels Secret Heart   2 comments

I walk out of the jailhouse into the heat of mid morning. The waves of heat already warping the road, making it look like I’m staring onto the ocean as I wait for the gate to open and let me out. I turn and look at the building, the gate grating across the rough gravel, and vow to never again be caught inside. I walk to the bus stop and sit on the bench, holding the bus voucher they gave me on the way out. The sun feels hot on my skin as I wait, wondering where the hell I’m supposed to go. I think of the only place I’d be welcomed with open arms.


I stopped and had lunch with my mom at work. We talked about my plans and the future. She gave me the extra key to her apartment, some money for the bus and I headed off into the sweltering heat of the day. Standing at the stop in front of her workplace, I have a decision to make. Go to her place and get my life together or head back to the streets. The bus comes before I decide so, I climb aboard and pay the fare.

I sat in the back beside a couple of guys I’d never met before and they strike up a conversation with me. By the time we get to my mom’s house, I’m soul kissing them. I get them to come with me to moms place and take them both to her bed where we fuck like rabbits till half an hour before mom was due home. I never saw them again after they left.

My mom’s apartment is in a run down area of town and has a couple of crack dealers in the complex that I know well. That night, I’m at Ice’s place, letting him fuck me so I can get high. I’ve told my mom I was going to be at his house but she doesn’t know he’s a dealer. I think she’d shit if she knew. I snag a few rocks from him for later and go back to moms. She’s asleep so I get myself something to eat in the darkness of the kitchen and slip into my little brothers bedroom. I slip into his bed and snuggle with him before drifting off to sleep.

When I wake up hours later, the house is empty and quiet. I take a long shower and dress in shorts and sleeveless shirt then grab the bus pass mom has bought me and stuff it into my purse. I get my glass crack pipe, put in a good-sized rock and light it up, sucking the heavenly cloud deep into my lungs. Immediately my body is throbbing and my head feels light. I finish the rock, hide the pipe and leave the apartment.


The smell of the traffic tickles my nose as I stretch my legs, pointing my shapely ass toward the street as I’m bending down to touch the hot concrete before me. I hear the squeal of tires and a metallic crunch as I stand up and turn, my eyes catching sight of a grey sedan with a green sports car attached to its back bumper. I let out a gasp and run over to them asking if everyone is OK. The older guy grumbles as he gets out and looks at the damage while the young man in the sports car searches for his insurance information. He turns to get out of the car, sees me and blushes before yelling at me about my damned sexy ass making him have an accident and how it should be illegal. I have to laugh and start walking away when the cops get there. I hear the officer yell at me to come back but I just keep walking, hoping they leave me alone.


After a lunch of burgers and fries, I sit just off the street, watching the undercover cops working Beverly over. She’s so old I swear she’s my mom’s age! I know she’s been on the streets a long time. According to her, she’s been arrested thirty-five times! I think she should settle down and leave the guys to us but, she’s not going anywhere.

The officers leave and she comes over to bum a smoke. We talk for a bit, she warns me the cops are heavy tonight and heads off toward her house. She’s taking the night off it would seem.That’s good. Means more money for me.


I look at the small, lighted dial on my wrist. Almost three AM and the traffic has gotten lighter. No tricks for half an hour and I’m sitting at Colfax and Yosemite, feet dangling off the wall. I’m bored and thinking of taking off for home. Tonight, I’m staying at the Lazy C motel. They know I’m a hooker and they don’t care, as long as I don’t bring the cops. I’ve managed to bring them a lot of business over the years and make no problems for them so they are happy. I never work out of that motel. It’s where I sleep.

He pulls up to the curb and calls my name. I look around and grin, seeing no cops around. I grab my small purse and trot over to the car, open the door and jump in. “hey Tom, how’s it hangin?” He chuckles “It’s not, now. You always make him stand up and pay attention” I laugh at this as he hands me twenty bucks. We drive up to the park and I make him feel less tense then he looks at me, breathlessly, for a bit before shaking his head. “Damn, if my wife was half that good…” “I’d be out a hundred dollars a week” I finished for him with a grin.

“You got that right! Hey, I’ve been wondering. How much to fuck you?” I grinned and squirmed “mmmm for you… thirty. I know you’re good for fifty but I also know that I’d love to feel you between my legs” He laughed and looks around “We’d have to get out of the car, no way we could do it over the stick shift!” I open the door and step out into the cool darkness, looking around “no ones around, we could go down by the creek and….” I walk around the front of the car as he gets out, pulling out his wallet.

He hands me thirty dollars and we head down the path to the creek. We find a spot and lay by the water, stroking and kissing like long-lost lovers. He is passionate and attentive, bringing my body to its peek and crashing over several times before finally filling me full. Afterward, we lay atop the blanket he’d brought, sweat drying off our skin, catching our breath.

He looked at me and chuckled “damn, Angel, I thought hookers hated sex!” I laughed hard and shook my head “not me, Tom. I love my job!” “no shit!” he exclaimed as he rolled over to me and kissed me tenderly. “you know, Angel, you don’t have to do this. I’d pay your rent for you if that’s why you do this….. I never asked why before but I’m curious. Why DO you do this?”

I sighed and looked up at the starry sky, my heart aching as my eyes teared up. “I can’t help it, Tom. It’s like a drug for me. I HAVE to. I’ve tried to stop, I’ve even gone to other states but I always find the street again” I take a deep breath and look at him It doesn’t matter how big the town is, either. Once I was in a podunk little town in Idaho and a guy in a bar asked me how much. Before I knew it, I was in his truck, getting a train pulled on me with the guys each giving me twenty bucks!”

He smiled at me and wiped a tear from my cheek “It’s not your fault, Angel. You OOZE sexuality. I think it’s because you are always so… confident. You’re sexy and you know it and that turns men on. You’re so beautiful and young and already you’re so sure of yourself..Trust me, that’s one reason I keep looking for you when I’m on Colfax”

I lift up on my elbows and look at him “So, you’re saying, that if I stopped being so confident, men will leave me alone?” He looked at me a moment and frowned “no… you know, I don’t think you can help it. You know how some people are naturally smart or natural leaders…. I think you’re just naturally sexy. It’s like your putting out pheromones that make men crazy around you.”

“Genetically predisposed to be a slut…. hmmm… you might be on to something there, Einstein. How about we test that theory?” I reach over and take his sticky flesh in my hand and grin, a soft purr from my lips “He seems to be paying attention again”

Big Apple Road Trip   2 comments

    I wake up in the morning and get my clothes ready. I pack my backpack and hobo bag I can slip over my shoulder. Steve is at work by now so I leave him a note telling him goodbye and head out the door.  I stop by the Churches and grab a 5 piece chicken and  some biscuits then hit the liquor store for a big bottle of pop and a fifth of Jack Daniels. I get onto the city bus that will take me as close to the freeway as possible. I grab a bottled water at the 7-11 by the freeway entrance then hit the road. I walk about a mile before getting my first ride.

A young guy stops his pickup and I run up to the passenger window. “How far you going?” He asks. I laugh “New York” He shakes his head and says “Hop in, I’ll take you as far as I’m going.”  I toss my backpack in the back of the truck and jump in the cab “Thanks!” I smile when I get in and slam the door, asking “So, how far are you going?” “Just to Byers but it’ll get you away from the city before rush hour is over.” His response spoken as he hits the gas. We talk small talk till he pulls off the highway and into a mom and pop type store. The guy gives me 20 bucks “for the road” before I get out. Nice guy. I thank him sweetly and get my bag from the bed of the truck.

   I resettle the packs on my back as I start walking back to the highway. Not long afterward a van pulls up and the passenger asks if I need a ride. I could smell the weed inside as I get in “Where ya goin sista?” asks a cute black chick in the back “New York” I tell her as I slip between the people “Oh, Toms going there. ‘m sure he won’t mind another babe in wit us.Will ya Tom?” From the front seat I hear “You know the rules. Grass, ass or cash, that’s all it takes to ride!” I dig into my pocket and hand up the twenty “That’s all the cash I got but I got all the ass you can handle if that isn’t enough.” There’s laughter all around and the black girl high fives me then asks me for a cigarette.

  Looking around the inside of the van as they pass a joint around, I notice it has a small bed in back that the girl is sitting on, smoking. “Sweet ride” I comment with a grin. “Me or the van?” she asks with a chuckle. I look her over and giggle “Both, truthfully” The guys closest to us bust out laughing and let out a whoop of excitement “Oh yeah, girl action!” One yells. The driver yells back “Not unless I can watch. I need some ass too you know!” They all laugh as I climb over the back of my seat to sit with her on the bed. 

  She rolls a joint as I ay on the bed, talking to her. We’re all talking and smoking, getting to know each other a bit as we’re going down the road. After a couple of hours, we stop for a pee and gas. All together, there are seven of us. Five guys and two girls.The guys go into the store while I pump the gas. Sassy goes in with a big tote that looks about half full. She and the guys come back out after I finish pumping the gas then we hit the road again.

  Back on the highway, Sassy opens her bag and dumps out a few candy bars, bags of chips, a loaf of bread and two packs of bologna. I laugh and shake my head “Got lunch, did you?” “Hell yeah I did. Them sons a bitches ain’t gon see me evah gin so why not? They gets lotsa money offa folks. They kin give sum food to tha cause” Cocking my head I ask “What cause?” She laughs “Tha causa my stomach makin noise at me!” We all roar with laughter for a bit. I throw together some sandwiches and pass them around while she rolls a couple more joints.

 The second day we are on the road, we stop at a rest area in Kansas. We all sit around a picnic table, talking and stretching our legs. Tom tells us we’re going to need gas by nightfall and we need to get some money. I offer myself for part of the money-making effort but the guys have something else in mind. Sassy laughs and takes my hand, telling me we need to let the guys talk. We grab our bags and head into the bathroom to freshen up. While we are in washing up, she tells me that the guys want us to themselves so us working wouldn’t be an option for them unless they HAD to. I ask her what they were going to do and she replies “They have their ways”

Snow Angel   5 comments

I’m walking my usual round today. From the capital building to Yosemite is about 5 miles, I think. Not that I even try to count but today I’m bored and count the blocks. Twenty three and a trick, three more and a John. Seven cops in ten blocks or one cop checking me out seven times. GOD I’m BORED today…

I stop at a bus stop and sit down next to a curly-haired guy who’s kinda cute. I strike up a conversation with him and ask him if he’s busy. He says no so I ask him if he wants to get laid. He looks at me, surprised and laughs. “Sure” is his response. I take him by the hand and all but drag him to the bushes. We have sex behind the bushes, making all sorts of noise but I don’t care. We get done and I ask him his name “Steve” he says with a chuckle then asks me mine “Angel” is my response. He laughs as he helps me up “No, you aren’t an Angel. You should change your name to slut or devil” I laugh and saunter off  down Colfax. Satisfied… for now.

I do a few tricks and that cop is sitting in the parking lot when I get out of the second car. He motions me over to him with a frown. I groan and walk over to him, smiling a fake smile. “Can I help you officer?” I ask innocently. He laughs and grabs my wrist tightly, his voice low “I know you’ve done at least three tricks, girl. What you charging them?” I swallow hard, my stomach tightening fearfully as I answer “Twenty dollars” “Give me ten and from now on, you’ll give me a third of what you get. You do what I say and I’ll keep an eye out for you” He pulls me closer to him as I take out my money and hand him a ten. I look at his badge quickly and he grabs my throat “Report me, slut, and they’ll find your lifeless body in an alley somewhere. Got it?” I nod and whimper, tears coming to my eyes. He lets me go and folds the ten, putting it into his shirt pocket. I stand there, dumbly staring at him till he chuckles and says “Don’t you have a cock or three to suck, slut?” I turn and walk, shakily, back to the corner, tears streaming down my face.

 Jamina watches me from across the street, only coming over after he’s gone. “Got ya, did he?” She asks as she folds her arms around me. I nod and break down, sobbing “He scared the hell out of me!” She sighs and strokes my head “He’s been doin that for ten years now, that I know of. Jus do what he tells ya and you’ll be aight.” She guides me over to the White Spot and we go inside for a bite to eat. “Ya gotta stay calm” She tells me “He’s jus a bully” I know she’s right but I’m already terrified of cops. I tell her about the rape and she nods, listening as she eats “Happens allatime, honey. Ya jus gotta roll  wit it and get ovah it. We all been there. Dis ain’t tha life fer tha weak, honeychil. Ya gotta be strong. Jus play along an you’ll live. I been doin this ten years now an I know. Them men kin be bastards but they gots tha cash, yanno” “I know, but, damnit why they have to be so mean all the time?” I ask through my tears. “I don’t think I can do this anymore. I just don’t know what else to do” She looks at me for the longest time and sighs “Come on, you need to get cleaned up”

She pays the ticket and we go into the bathroom. She locks the door and pulls a small pouch from her pocket “I’m gon give you somethin ta calm you down, babe. Not too much cause it’s my stash but ya need it.” Jamina taps some white powder onto the counter and hands me a tiny straw “Jus suck it up wit yo nose, like dis” She puts it to my nose, closing the opposite one with a slender, brown finger. I do like she says, holding the straw to the powder and snorting it up. I feel like a vacuüm cleaner and start to laugh. She giggles as she taps out some more powder and snorts it up herself. “Damn, what was that?” I ask. She looks at me with a toothy grin “Coke, sistah. Tha good shit. You know, pure snow” My head begins to get fuzzy and I feel GREAT. I grab her and kiss her passionately before laughing and heading to the toilet to pee.

I spend the rest of the night in a bit of a blur. I turned a few tricks then went home, stopping by the Churches and grabbing a box of chicken to share with the cat. As I walk home, Steve is standing at the bus stop near my apartment. I invite him to my place for dinner.

Posted March 11, 2012 by I'm taking a nap in Memoirs

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Bound by a dead man {MATURE}   Leave a comment

{Caution, VERY graphic, NSFW or kids}

I’m walking down East Colfax as always. I stop at the walk up burger joint and get a bite to eat. As I’m eating, one of my regulars pulls into the parking lot and gets out of his car. He’s one of the unmarried ones and I know his utter hatred of police. He grabs a burger and sits at the table across from me, not wanting to be seen sitting with me.We chat between bites and after we’re done, I walk down the block where he’s waiting in his car. I get in and we go to his place, small talk comes easily between us. Him asking about my health, contact with cops and such. He hands me the 500 he has for the night and I stick it into my tiny purse next to the condoms and gum as we sit at the red light at Yosemite and 1st. He lives in the country so he pays extra for me to stay the night. He says he loves waking up next to me. I giggle and blush accordingly.

  Back at his house, he pulls into the barn and looks at me, an odd gleam in his eye. I’m looking at him and laughing about something he says about horsing around when he grabs my hair and pulls me violently to him. I’m shocked and going numb with fear because he’s never been this way before. He’s always been a gentle man but this night there was something else on his mind. He pulls me from the car by my hair and I’m screaming. I know no one can hear me but it’s all I can do. Sobbing and stumbling as he drags me to the back of the barn to the horse stalls, I plead for him to stop. He can tell I’m terrified and stops a moment to look at me. His voice is soft as he speaks “Don’t worry darling, I ain’t gon kill ya, we just din things a might different tonight” Then he drags me a little further and shoves me against something hard and cold. His hard body is pressed against me, hands grabbing mine and locking something around my wrists. He backs up and I pull against my bonds, looking at them with horror. “what are you doing?  Jack, please let me go, please!” His laughter from behind me sends chills down my back. “I’ll be right back my little whore, just hang around a minute” He chuckled as he walked through the barn and out into the darkness of the night.

I hang there, shivering in the unheated barn, tears drying on my face as I wait for him to return. I hear the horse nickering softly beside me, his nose touches my back and I shriek in surprise, jerking away as much as I can. “He don’t mean no harm, Angel. He just gettin ta know ya” He’s carrying a large leather bag as he comes in. “Please Jack, what are you doing, please let me down, you’re scaring me.” I whimper as I watch him take out some objects I’ve never seen before. “I told ya, Angel, we tryin somethin new tonight” He opens a tiny black bottle and takes a deep snort from it then brings it to me, forcing it under my nose. The smell is HORRIBLE and instantly makes my head swim. My vision blurs and I feel like I’m going to puke. Everything begins to get fuzzy and his voice seems awfully far away before going blank.

The next thing I know, I’m laying across something, tied by the ankles and wrists. He’s moving behind me, something imbedded in my pussy, stretching me painfully. He slaps my ass hard and yells “Wake up slut, you’re missin it all!” I yelp and struggle weakly against the bindings, head swimming as I try to remember where I am. Suddenly the large object is removed and I feel something tickling my ass. I look over my shoulder and see Jack, standing on a crate, some sort of log looking thing in his hands only it looks strange to my blurry sight. Abruptly he shoves it into me and turns a lever which instantly sends something warm and sticky into me.  I thought it was water at first but then he takes out the hose and the fluid gushes from me, creating an overwhelmingly powerful orgasm that leaves me writhing as his cock rams into my ass. He ploughs my ass as he rakes his gloved hands over my back, the feeling of ten thousand razors rips into my flesh. I can’t stop orgasming, sobbing with the pleasure and pain, my body reacting in ways I never thought possible. I scream and thrash about till he removes himself from me, spent and softening, his body draped over my back as he tries to catch his breath. He slowly raises himself off and pats my ass, speaking breathlessly “Damn, Angel, that was somethin else, wasn’t it?” I couldn’t speak, only nodded before dropping my head. I dozed for a while, spent and shaking as the cool air caressed my drenched body.

I’m awakened to the feel of something soft and warm sliding over my naked ass and cunt, the sound of horses hooves nearby on the hay. I moan, the feeling undeniably sweet, awakening my body with each caress of wetness. He doesn’t say a word, just washed me gently with the softest cloth I’ve ever felt. He somehow slips it inside me, a gasp slipping from my lips as I look over my shoulder. He’s not there! Stanly, his stud, is behind me, his tongue slipping over me like the sweet caress of a lover. I try to kick, feeling disgusted and sick at the thought of a horse licking my most intimate of places. I cry out for Jack but he’s laying in the hay nearby, unmoving. I can’t tell if he’s dead or what. My god what was I going to do if he were dead?? I’m tied to this contraption and can’t get loose. I call and call for Jack but he’s not responding. I watch for his chest to rise and fall but I can’t really tell in the darkness. Stanly gets bored or something and leaves me alone. I lay my head down, sobbing and crying out to Jack, I’m beginning to think he’s dead.

The sun is rising as I wake up, my body aching and stiff, the bindings cutting into my swelling extremities. I sneeze as the dust is stirred up by the growing wind outside. I’m so tired and am more convinced than ever that Jack is dead. He hasn’t moved and his color is ashen. I cry some because I’m afraid and sad. Jack was a great guy, really… I didn’t know if he had any family or friends that would check on us. I talked to Jack, begging at first, for him to wake up. After a few hours, by the shadows, I fell asleep again, dreaming odd dreams of horses and sex. I woke again much later, the sky growing dark as the day waned. Jack was still laying there and as I looked at him, it dawned on me that his head was wrong. Well, not his head but.. something. I KNEW he was dead and that I was pretty much screwed. I began to struggle with the bonds, pulling hard and groaning through the pain. I started feeling the warmth of blood dribbling down my swollen fingers. I cursed Jack for his excellent tying and struggled harder. Eventually I passed out from the pain in my arms, weakness taking me into its delicate arms and cradling me sweetly in a dreamless slumber.

Morning, day two, greeted me with a bird settling on my naked ass. I screamed as I saw a spider skittering across the boards before me. I HATED spiders! Struggling against the ropes again, I realised I was getting weaker. I thought of when I’d eaten last and sighed. I began to wonder how long it would take me to die from hunger or a blood clot or a coyote finding Jacks rotting body and investigating. I envisioned a man coming to me and unbinding me, rescuing me from my captivity and carrying me away.  As the shadows grew shorter, I began to sing softly, my voice cracking from thirst but it made me feel better. Singing always did sooth me when I was afraid. I spent the rest of the day listening to my belly grumbling and sleeping. Darkness was full when I heard him. Softly calling Jacks name from out by the house. I called out, my voice strained, throat dry as the dust in the barn. I heard a car door slam and the engine rev as it drove away. I sobbed, crying out in anger and fear at my potential saviors “I’m here! HELP ME!!” The engine noise faded into the night and I drifted off, softly crying. 

Morning again or was it evening? I couldn’t tell anymore but the smell was getting bad. I couldn’t tell if it was the horse shit or the rotting body of my dead companion but it was bad whatever it was. I heard the slam of a truck door and tried to cry out. My voice little more than a whisper as  I heard the voice calling, getting closer. Someone trips over something in the entrance to the barn and they let out a line of pain filled curses. He calls into the darkness of the barn and comes back toward the horse pens, muttering and cursing, talking to the corpse of his friend. He stops when he sees me. I can see the look of surprise in his face as he registers what’s before him. I’m still, looking at him unblinkingly as he stares at my naked body tied to the contraption. He walks up to me and touches my cold ass, I guess making sure I was real. He looks over and sees his friend laying in the hay and sighs “Damn bro, you could a at least untied the filly afore dyin.” His hand on my cold ass jumps, the muscle twitching enough to send the man’s hand flying off with surprise. “Damn girl, you still alive?!” He stammered out. I whisper “yes” before everything goes dark again.

I wake on my back, the smell different yet the same, my eyes covered with a damp rag. I try to move but find myself bound again or was that still? I feel the softness beneath me and gather I’m in a bed somewhere. I can hear the wind through the trees and birds somewhere chirping. The smell of coffee is strong as I hear, in the distance, the sound of men talking. The sound of a door slam and departing engine precedes the clomp of heavy boots on a wooden floor. He whistles as he comes inside and I hear the door being locked, something dropping hard on the floor and more footsteps. “Are ya awake lil filly?” I hear from my left “Yes” I whisper “can I have a drink?” I hear a chortles and s plastic cup being filled. Strong hands lift my head and cool water is trickled into my mouth. I choke on it as it seeps into my parched throat, the man speaking softly “Take it easy there girl, ya been through a mess ain’t ya? Old Jack should a known he couldn’t handle a gal like you.” he chuckled and slid a rough hand up my leg, caressing my thigh intimately. “Tell me, youngun, how old are ya?” “I’m nineteen, sir. Just a kid… please, can you take this thing off my eyes? It itches” He aquiesces and removes the cloth “Yanno, you ain’t goin nowhere fer a while, girly. I got plans for ya.” I swallow hard and take a deep breath. “What if I scream?” I ask. He shakes his head “Noone gonna hear you and if ya scream too much, I just gonna have ta ductape your mouth and feed ya through a straw. Ya see, I done this before and ner got caught. Got too many friends that kin get ya off a my hands if need be. Now, lets talk about tha future, shall we?” I looked at him with a sinking feeling and nodded, not trusting my voice.

Posted February 8, 2012 by I'm taking a nap in Thoughts

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